Everybody Wants Angela Merkel's Sweet, Sweet Lovin'

Poor Angela Merkel. It can't be easy being a pretty girl the only female at all those international summits mostly attended by men of low morals.

First she had to use a Klingon Karate move to fight off George W. Bush's advances:

And now word reaches us that she is sick and tired of French president's Nicolas Sarkozy's wandering hands:

Germany's Chancellor Angela Merkel has made it clear that she does not relish being kissed and pawed every time she meets France's Nicolas Sarkozy.

The French President has cultivated a touchy-feeling relationship with his German counterpart, tutoyer-ing and embracing her like a long-lost friend since even before he became President. Frau Merkel - a studious East German minister's daughter - appears to have put up with the Latin Sarkozy's affections at the outset, but has become increasingly weary of his affections.

According to the daily Le Parisien, Merkel's circle is putting word about that Sarkozy should back off with the bises and back-slapping. The previous President, Jacques Chirac, played the Gallic gentlemen with Frau Merkel, giving her a delicate kiss on the hand when they met. Sarkozy has stopped short of bear hugs and ruffling her hair, but not far short.

To poor Angela, I dedicate the great Shirley Bassey with "Can I Touch You... There?"

Shirley Bassey - Can I Touch You... There?

To Bush and Sarkozy, I dedicate the Tubes with "Don't Touch Me There!"
No means no, guys.