Movie Review: A Single Man

So the two movies I saw so far this year were "A Serious Man" about a middle aged college professor whose life is crap and "A Single Man" about, well, a middle aged college professor whose life is crap.

I read Isherwood's novel for the first time last year. I'll mention that I picked up the book at a used book store specializing in English language books in Avignon in the South of France just because that sounds so damn cool.

I was worried that Hollywood would add a happy ending, or explosions and more chicks to make it more of a straight guy flick, but none of that happened.

It's an incredibly sad story, most of the action is internal to the lead character brought to tragic life by Colin Firth who really outdoes himself. I hope he gets that Oscar. Julianne Moore is also amazing, but unlike Firth you sometimes get the impression that she was trying to get nominated every single moment she was on camera. Unlike Firth, she didn't get a nod though.

The movie is directed by fashion designer Tom Ford, and the fact that the movie often looks like a perfume ad sometimes took me out of the story. It's a story about very real emotions, but it hardly ever loses that fairy tale visual quality. In some moments though, it works, and then it works brilliantly. When a dying man is shot with that sense of beauty, it evoked images of Michelangelo's Pieta in me.

I wish I hadn't had to sleep alone after watching "A Single Man." It's certainly a picture that stays with you.

Comic Book Artist ChrisCross is a Heartless Ingrate

ChrisCross (born as Christopher Williams, not to be confused with the musician he wisely picked an alias that is also used by a musician) owes his career to gay characters and gay and gay-friendly creators.

His breakthrough work came on Blood Syndicate, a series created by liberal Dwayne McDuffie and brought to critical acclaim by gay writer Ivan Velez, Jr, who also drew and wrote the great "Tales of the Closet."

ChrisCross went on to draw Captain Marvel for gay-friendly Peter A. David's scripts, a series featuring a lesbian relationship. After he did not get what he wanted from DC on the then new Firestorm series, he went on to draw one of comicdom's most famous gay heroes, the Midnighter, who happens to be married to his teammate Apollo.

All of that did not stop ChrisChross from voting for Proposition 8 and hiding behind his bible to defend that shameful human rights violation, as told by one of his facebook contacts here.

When said contact told him he could no longer be his fan in light of his hateful actions, this was ChrisCross' reply:

Glad to hear that. I"m proud of my vote. Only i'm not hating. Read First Timothy in the Bible, my brother. Then ask me why i voted that way. I'm a Christian, and i stand what God stands for, not society. And i'm not impressed or DEpressed by your disappointment. But i'm glad you were a fan.
:D

Always remember to add a smiley face to your bigotry, kids!

As a black man, ChrisCross should realize that the same kind of politically motivated interpretation of obscure bible passages has been used by other hate groups to oppose interracial marriage.

As a creator who might be drawing portraits on a sidewalk for a nickel if it wasn't for the gay community, he should just keep his pie hole shut about his own bigotry at the very least.

Pathetic terrorism failure wants to be even less of a hero to his sad cause

Christmas terror suspect pleads not guilty.
Turns out crispy fried penis was actually his idea of a delicious in-flight snack. And really, considering the quality of airline food, who can blame him.

Special points to the AP writers for pointing out that a Nigerian speaks English. In other news, water is wet.

Celebrity Gift Suggestions: Sarah Palin

At a personal request, this very special edition of Celebrity Gift Suggestions is dedicated to Sarah Palin, former beauty vice-queen, former mayor of New Novosibirsk, former Governor and former poster child for abstinence only sex education. It must be quite difficult having to find a gift for Ms Palin - you can't get her a magazine or newspaper subscription, she already reads all of them. You can't get her anything for the house, she gets everything done thanks to nepotism. So what can you get for the mother of Track, Bristol, Willow, Piper, and Trig Palin, grandmother of Tripp Palin-Johnston?

Why, this hot off the presses book, of course!

Celebrity Gift Suggestions: Buju Banton

Currently Grammy Award nominated homophobe and recording hate monger, Buju Banton, is in a prison cell in Miami charged with "conspiracy to possess with intent to distribute more than five kilos of cocaine."

So, if you are Buju's cell mate and realizing: This guy is gonna be here for a while, I better make nice with him - here is the perfect gift to get Mr Banton for the upcoming holiday.



Reggae for Dummies - because Buju? You're using the wrong drugs, dumbass. You're supposed to smoke "Ganja" to be taken seriously in reggae circles. And it's more than a little ironic that a guy who buys into the brain dead idea that homosexuality was somehow injected into your society by white men would be found neck-deep in what is essentially considered a white drug in every meaning of the word.

The Timely Return of Celebrtity Gift Suggestions

It's that time of year again!


The time when plastic lawn ornaments, made by underage Chinese political prisoners in overlong night shifts, stand in the rain on this our warmer globe.


The time when you can hear the greatest hits of Whitney Houston - played on the pan flute, while drinking cheap hot wine that's only drinkable with enough cinnamon added to cover up the methanol taste.


That's right, lads and gentlebeings: It's time for that annually returning blog sensation, Celebrity Gift Suggestions.


This year, I'm kicking things off with the United States' favorite conspiracy theorist and fear monger, Glenn Beck. Don't spell his name Glen, as you never know when you might need an extra N to evoke Godwin's Law!


For Glenn Beck this year, a hypothetical loved one should run, not walk, to the local toy store to get him a box of Clue.





Because really, if Glenn isn't gonna get a Clue, we must buy one for him.

And no, Glenn: "President Obama with a forged birth certificate in the White House Library" is not a valid answer to win this game.

Too many classless people using google

Just a quick post to a nice pic of Michelle Obama.

Google news stories about google image searches to find out why.

Celebrity gift suggestions will return soon.

Chris Brown gets off easy

Woman beater Chris Brown made a plea deal to keep him out of jail.

And no sir, I don't like it.

He should have had to serve at least 6 months of the sentence. Among the violent juveniles I work with, probation is considered a win, pretty much.

And we all know that his community work is gonna come down to performing free concerts for puppies, i.e. promote his new album.

And why aren't they making him pay like a million to a woman's shelter or something? Missed opportunity there to have some of his money go to a better cause than blow and herpes medication.

Republican Perv Panda of Pennsylvania

An aide to Republican State Senator Jane Orie (R-PA) found an interesting way to try and make up for the extinction of rare animal species caused by Republican pro-industry policies: Dress up as an endangered critter and try to mate with underage boys.

Yes. Alan David Berlin, a 40-year-old conservative, tried to have sex with a 14-year-old boy using the name "alan_panda_bear" on internet forums for furries. That's people who think the series of "Beethoven" movies is soft porn, if you don't know.

Because if it's not weird beyond belief, it's not a Republican sex scandal.

So without any further ado (as I am quite speechless), here is Big Mama Thornton's Hound Dog - for all you animal lovers out there.

The All-Dark, All-Grim Future of DC Comics

Some "spoilers" if you have not read comics in the past 8 years or so.
Some "soilers" if you have a weak stomach.



To sum up the past couple of years in DC Comics: Sue Dibny gets raped by Dr Light and killed by Jean Loring along with her unborn baby in Identity Crisis.
Blue Beetle gets shot in the head by a supporting character from the most humorous take the Justice League had ever known in Countdown. Bwa-ha.. huh?
Pantha gets her head torn off on panel and Phantom Lady gets a sword poked through her obscene cleavage in Infinite Crisis.
Big Barda dies near her refrigerator while putting away groceries in DonG.
Martian Manhunter, first of the Silver Age heroes, gets murdered by d-listers in Final Crisis. Batman buys it, too, but nobody buys that.
Barry Allen is the new dark detective, fighting crime because his mother was brutally murdered in Flash: Rebirth.
1970s cartoon characters get murdered and otherwise brutalized in Teen Titans.
Jericho goes on a murderous rampage in Titans.
King Kobra kills babies on live TV in Faces of Evil.



And now they tell us in the promotional material for Blackest Night:

The dead rise across the DC Universe, bringing terror and darkness with them.

Wow! Terror and darkness will come to the DC Universe!


Just how will we be able to tell the difference?


Clearly, DC will have to up the ante to keep fans reading. But where do you go once you crossed the "killing babies on live TV" threshold? How can you avoid becoming anticlimactic?


I say go for the big H.


Holocaust on Earth 2 (the last days of the Justice Society - for real... who likes old people?)
Holocaust on Earth 5 (watch Tawny the Tiger go to the gas chambers)
Identity Holocaust (the rapes of Wonder Woman, Black Canary, Ma Hunkel and Lois Lane)
Holocaust on Infinite Earths (all the Flashes die this time)
Infinite Holocaust (Johnny DC is revealed to be a 5th-Dimensional imp and kills every Titan and former JLI member who is still left)
Final Holocaust (nobody will be quite sure what's happening in this one as it's written in a revolutionary new style that features dialogs as haikus that aren't included in the book but can be accessed via Twitter)

I mean, when you got it, flaunt it, Dan DiDio!

Rihanna to Cover Crystals Classic?

Usually deluded sources tell me that Rihanna's next single is a cover of the Crystal's infamous song, He Hit Me And It Felt Like A Kiss, written by the fabulous Carole King.

This exclusive piece of information is, of course, badly fabricated. But at this point, it would not surprise me the least bit.

In other Rihanna news, lawyers for Ms Tina Turner are rumored to prepare a copyright infringement suit against the Bajan songstress.

Good Riddance, 2008

As the last few hours of 2008 are ticking down here, I'm trying to avoid reflecting too much on all the bad things that went down in this, the worst year I remember living through.

Damn! This sure was no pick nick. And to add insult to injury, they're making this stinker of a year a second longer!

So anyway. Hit the road, 2008. Don't let the door hit ya.

I found this really nice New Years Eve clip of Gladys Knight singing "Overnight Success" on youtube. May 2009 bring us all the fulfillment of our dreams.

Our Prayers Are Answered: Medical Breakthrough

Heroic scientists have found a cure for one of the most devastating ailments of our times: Flimsy-eye-lash syndrome.

Allergan Inc, the maker of Botox, said on Friday that the U.S. Food and Drug Administration has approved its eyelash-thickening drug Latisse.

Latisse is designed to treat a condition known as hypotrichosis of the eyelashes, which means a person does not have enough eyelashes.

The active ingredient in Latisse is bimatroprost, the same ingredient that is in Allergan's glaucoma treatment Lumigan. Patients taking Lumigan found a side effect of the drug to be eyelash growth, prompting Allergan to study it for the new use.

Latisse is a once-daily prescription treatment that is applied to the base of the upper eyelash with a sterile, single-use-per-eye disposable applicator. Once treatment is stopped, eyelashes will gradually return to where they were prior to treatment.

True, it's more of a treatment than a permanent cure, but even so: No longer will those who suffer from flimsy-eyelash-syndrome (FES) be unable to throw a sultry wink at a handsome man in a three piece suit. No longer will small insects be able to dive into their eye balls like Greg Louganis into a pool. This amazing discovery lashes out at a debilitating affliction that affected dozens of people around the world.

To celebrate this great discovery, here is one of the most stylish videos of all time, Ashford and Simpson's "Found a Cure!"

Celebrity Gift Suggestions: Rick Warren

I've been out with bronchitis for a while, but I am recovering just in time to bring you another installment of the Internet's fastest growing blog sensation, Celebrity Gift Suggestions.

Today's gift is just perfect for Rick Warren. I'm sure we're all a bit stumped how a right wing preacher who compared President Elect Obama to a holocaust denier before the election now ended up being invited to do some superstitious hoodoo I don't get at the inauguration. But we can't be as stumped as Warren's family members, who are facing the task of buying a gift for somebody who made enough money with his book deals to bail out the auto industry all by himself.

Well, be stumped no more, Warrenses. Your prayers have been answered!

For Rick Warren: A Mike Jones gift certificate.



A few hours with the man who previously serviced Warren's esteemed colleague Ted Haggard, and possibly Larry Craig, too, and Rick could get out of his system whatever makes him think about homosexuality so much. Everybody wins!

Just a word of advice, Mr Warren: No barebacking at Saddleback, mmmkay? We want this Christmas to remain merry!

Celebrity Gift Suggestions: Ann Coulter

I am not sure if this person does have loved ones, but here is today's gift suggestion for right wing harpy, Ann Coulter.





A straw.

It's two gifts in one, really: First, she will need one to have her daily small diet water, as she broke her jaw recently and they wired it shut - hopefully permanently. I mean that in the most loving and constructive way possible.
Also, the straw being very thin, 100% white and completely empty is a dead ringer for Ann - so you can tell her it's the ultra rare new Ann Coulter action figure!

The straw is available for free in most fast food restaurants and already comes gift-wrapped in stylish white paper. Show her she's worth it!